Green Eyes
by Katherine Elaine
Summary: Dalton!Verse - Jogan. For three years, Julian has been haunted by the green eyes of his best friend, whose attention has always seemed to stray elsewhere. On his last night at Dalton, Julian learns otherwise.


It was the last time he'd sat on the edge of the bed during another sleepless night; the final time he'd pulled that door closed behind him, locking in all his secrets. Yes, Julian Larson-Armstrong had, as the saying goes, done his time; he was a free man, now.

And his only plan in the moment was to use that freedom for the better - or, what he felt was "the better".

He'd fought it for a long time; the tears, the night terrors, the memories. He could still feel it like it was yesterday - the jealous rage he'd been in for longer than he could remember.

But Julian remembered the feelings, and that was enough.

He was tired of watching it all fall apart before him, something that could so easily be broken but not mended: his heart. He couldn't stand one more mention of "Kurt this" and "Kurt that", and "Kurt, Kurt, Kurt". For once in his life - just one day, just one short minute - he just wanted Logan to think of him, instead.

Logan. His best friend, and probably the most oblivious human on the planet.

It didn't matter how hard Julian could have tried to tell him, searching for words between sharp inhaling of breath, or how obvious he could have made it through song and dance, through poetry, or even, should it have come down to it, through recitations of Shakespeare. Julian was a glass house, and Logan was throwing stones.

So, it was that night, that final night he spent there, that he'd finally say everything he had to say, and Logan would never know.

The piano's keys looked as if they were polished until any trace of a fingerprint or a speck of dust had been removed. He could practically see his own reflection on them, but was glad he couldn't; he didn't want to face the broken boy staring back at him. His fingers graced the keys, moving as if he'd been born to play, as if he'd been made to be here. Throwing caution to the wind, he sang with unhidden beauty.

_Honey, you are a rock  
>Upon which I stand<br>And I came here to talk  
>I hope you understand<br>_

Outside, footsteps stopped, standing still to listen to a voice that had been heard so many times before - except that it was different, somehow. There was a detectable amount of sorrow in the voice, and though he wasn't too familiar with the song, he recognized its sound as if he'd heard it a thousand times. Peering through the keyhole, Logan could see the way Julian's hands seemed to glide across the piano effortlessly with swift movement.

The expression on Jules' face told him, undoubtedly, that something wasn't right. Had he and Derek been fighting? No, there was something more final in his tone as he sang. And if Logan was sure of any one thing, it was that these words had a value._ So, why this song?_

_The green eyes, yeah, the spotlight,  
>Shines upon you<br>_

Had Logan heard right? Green eyes? He looked confused momentarily before deciding he'd more than likely heard wrong._ The spotlight shines upon you, _Logan thought, mulling over meaning. Why did Julian have to speak in such riddles? He was an actor, after all.

An actor, Logan realized, who was leaving again. The question remained, why?

_And how could anybody deny you?  
><em>

Things started to add up. Green eyes, spotlight, deny. Had these not all related to the two of them on such a direct level, Logan might have not seen it. But Logan had been denied so many times - and something inside him just knew.

_I came here with a load  
>And it feels so much lighter now I met you<em>

_And honey you should know  
>That I could never go on without you<br>Green eyes_

And now, somehow, Logan was sure of everything - he had heard right. There has never been a more perfect moment for him to stand, to walk in and just talk to him, but his legs wouldn't let him move.

He wished he could look away from the pained, broken expression that crossed Julian's face, but he was frozen in place, in time, and though it had crossed his mind that he was meant to see this, to be here right now, he knew he wasn't.__

_Honey, you are the sea  
>Upon which I float<br>And I came here to talk  
>I think you should know<br>_

_The green eyes, you're the one that I wanted to find  
>And anyone who tried to deny you must be out of their mind<em>

He wanted to run into the room, to confess to Julian what he'd just seen and heard. He wanted to stand and hold Julian in his arms, pull him into a passion, desperate kiss. He wanted to tell him everything, to convince him not to leave... But the decision wasn't his to make.

_Because I came here with a load  
>And it feels so much lighter since I met you<br>Honey you should know  
>That I could never go on without you<br>Green eyes, green eyes_

Julian stared into the nothingness as he sang, choking back his tears. The lump in his throat was rising, but he had to stay strong, even if it hurt him. Things wouldn't change, even if he'd stayed, and he knew that - or thought he did. It was the last few chords, though, that ultimately did him in.__

_Honey you are a rock  
>Upon which I stand…<em>

The weight lifted from the keys, and he stood once again, staring up at the ceiling and drying his eyes. It was the hardest goodbye he would ever have to say, but it was time. In his solitary confinement, he whispered to himself, "I love you, Logan."

As he headed to the door, Logan stood away, off to the side and out of Julian's line of sight. The door opened, missing him by a fraction of an inch.

"Wait -"

The brunette continued walking.

"Jules, wait -"

Julian's head dipped, as if hanging in guilty silence, but kept walking. He couldn't bring himself to meet those eyes, those burning emeralds he's dreamed about for so long now…

The green eyes.

Logan choked on all the words he couldn't say, stuttering out what he could as the front doors creaked opened in the dead silence.

"Jules, I love -"

They closed with a bang, slamming shut behind Julian one final time. He would never be complete again.

"- you."


End file.
